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Top 10 Standard Internet Comments

Pete Brown - 03 March 2010

You too can be part of the internet fun. Just pick one of these comments at random and post it to any blog post, youtube vid, or anything else with a public comment field. Guaranteed to work 100% of the time. Bonus points if you trigger a comment war.

 

10. Lame. Go look at <url>, they did it better.

9. <insert instant godwin's law trigger here>

8. OMG LOL YOUR FRIGGIN HILARIOUS [resist the urge to spell "you're" correctly if you want to be taken seriously]

7. Typical stupid <nationality/race/sex>

6. That is totally offensive to <nationality/race/sex>

5. Hey, I'm a <nationality/race/sex> and I didn't find it offensive. Lighten up. [this works best if you're not actually of that nationality/race/sex]

4. <drunken rant full of expletives>

3. Fake! (or "Shopped!")

2. Someone has too much time on their hands.

1. First!

 

You know you want to do it. Now you're armed and ready. Go forth, minions!

       
posted by Pete Brown on Wednesday, March 3, 2010
filed under:        

6 comments for “Top 10 Standard Internet Comments”

  1. Gravatar of Joshua BlakeReply
    Joshua Blakesays:
    Wednesday, March 3, 2010 at 5:52:40 PM
    #10 reminded me of various forms of comment spam that are generic enough to sound like they are a response but are solely design to drive traffic. For example, "I really like this article. Go read mine: <SPAMMY URL>"

    P.S. First!
  2. Gravatar of W.MeintsReply
    W.Meintssays:
    Thursday, March 4, 2010 at 3:16:47 AM
    Obviously I can't come up with a comment like "first!". Thanks Joshua ;)
    I have to say though that some spammers have become more clever than just posting comments like that. I've seen comments written by a person that used a spam url to link to their "website".
  4. Gravatar of Mike BrownReply
    Mike Brownsays:
    Thursday, March 4, 2010 at 12:45:53 PM
    I have an actual story that goes along with this one
    2. Someone has too much time on their hands

    A coworker had taken the time to write a bunch of documentation for a project we were working together (with a few other colleagues). I was really impressed with the work and said so in my reply email and followed it up with Someone has too much time on their hands and a wink. He wasn't too happy with that statement and totally glossed over the compliments.

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